10 Common IELTS Essay Mistakes + Real Band 9 Replacements

10 Common IELTS Essay Mistakes + Real Band 9 Replacements

❌ Mistake 1: Using Personal Examples

Wrong: “My brother learned coding through YouTube.”

✅ Band 9: “In many developing nations, students now rely heavily on online platforms for technical education due to limited classroom access.”

❌ Mistake 2: Vague Studies

Wrong: “A study says online classes are boring.”

✅ Band 9: “In a 2023 UNESCO report, 60% of secondary students reported reduced engagement during remote learning sessions.”

❌ Mistake 3: Overusing “Some People Say...”

Wrong: “Some people say fast food is bad.”

✅ Band 9: “Many health experts argue that excessive fast-food consumption contributes to rising obesity levels, especially in urban areas.”

❌ Mistake 4: Using Overly Personal Phrases

Wrong: “I believe this is really good for me.”

✅ Band 9: “This phenomenon appears particularly beneficial for young professionals seeking work-life balance.”

❌ Mistake 5: Repeating Words from the Question

Wrong: “Technology is important. This essay will discuss technology.”

✅ Band 9: “Digital innovations have revolutionised everyday life, influencing everything from communication to education.”

❌ Mistake 6: Saying “I think,” “In my opinion” Repeatedly

Wrong: “In my opinion, it is good. I think it's better.”

✅ Band 9: “This trend undeniably offers more advantages than drawbacks, particularly in terms of accessibility.”

❌ Mistake 7: Informal Language

Wrong: “Kids drop out because they’re bored.”

✅ Band 9: “Many adolescents disengage from academic settings due to a lack of relevant curriculum and teaching support.”

❌ Mistake 8: Weak Conclusions

Wrong: “So that’s why I think it’s good.”

✅ Band 9: “Owing to it, implementing stricter regulations on advertising to children seems not only justified but urgently necessary.”

❌ Mistake 9: Generalised Claims

Wrong: “Everyone uses smartphones all the time.”

✅ Band 9: “In metropolitan areas, smartphones have become indispensable tools for both communication and commerce.”

❌ Mistake 10: Overusing Surveys

Wrong: “Surveys show students don’t like homework.”

✅ Band 9: “For example, in Finland, students ranked homework among the least motivating aspects of school life.”